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Dog Jokes







vram46
Novice


Aug 7, 2009, 6:52 PM

Post #1 of 15 (2846 views)
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Dog Jokes Can't Post

How Many Dogs Do You Need to Change a Lightbulb?
We love dogs. And they can be so funny. Read funny dog jokes.

Boxer
Who cares? I can play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

Greyhound
It isn't moving. Who cares?

Labrador Retriever
Oh, me, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeze? Please, please, please?

Golden Retriever
The day is young. The sun is shining. We've got our whole lives ahead of us. And you're inside the house worrying about a burned out bulb?

Jack Russell Terrier
I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the furniture and walls.

Cocker Spaniel
Why bother changing it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

Australian Shepherd
First, let me put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

Rottweiler
Try and make me.

Chihuahua
Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or - We don't need no stinkin' light bulb!

Border Collie
Just one. Then I'll replace any wiring I find that's not up to code.

Old English Sheep Dog
What light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see any light bulb!

German Shepherd
I'll change it as soon as I've led these people out of the dark, checked to make sure I haven't missed anyone and made one last perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

Dachshund
You know I can't reach that dumb lamp!

Poodle
Let me just blow in the border collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails should be dry.

IF YOU GUYS GOT ONE...PLS DO SHARE YOUR JOKESFrownFrown


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 7, 2009, 7:04 PM

Post #2 of 15 (2843 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

 

On a hot summer day, a country bumpkin came into town with his dog. He tied the dog under the shade of a tree and went into the bar for a cold beer.

About 20 minutes later a policeman came into the bar and asked who owned the dog tied under the tree. The bumpkin said that it was his. The policeman said, "Your dog seems to be in heat."

The bumpkin replies, "No way dog's in heat...she's cool kawse I got 'er tied unner the shade tree."

The policeman says, 'No! You don't understand your dog needs to be bred.'

"No way,' the bumpkin says, 'dog don't need bread, she ain't hongry, kawse I fed 'ER beef jerky this mornin'."

Now the policeman gets mad and yells out; 'NO! You don't seem to understand, your dog wants to have sex!'

The redneck looks at him with a long pause and says,

"Go 'head. I always wanted a police dog."


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 7, 2009, 7:09 PM

Post #3 of 15 (2842 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

DOG FIGHT


A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own that rottweiler outside?"

"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"

"Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him."

"What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly.

"How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?"

"Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 7, 2009, 7:12 PM

Post #4 of 15 (2841 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

A BLIND MAN'S DOG


While waiting for a bus, the blind man's dog decided to go to the bathroom all over the blind man's legs.

A passerby commented to the blind man, "What! That dog just went to the bathroom all over your legs, and you are petting him? Are you crazy?"

To which the blind man replied, "Madam, I am not petting him, I am feeling for his bottom, so I can kick him."


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


chrislimyy
K9 Kaki


Aug 8, 2009, 3:49 AM

Post #5 of 15 (2826 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

haha, that's a good one! LaughSlyLaughSlyLaughSly


luv_leehom517
K9 Maniac

Aug 8, 2009, 6:52 AM

Post #6 of 15 (2813 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

the poodle one soo funny!!haha..suits my poodle too..calling her 100 times oso like deaf one..


vram46
Novice


Aug 8, 2009, 9:18 AM

Post #7 of 15 (2797 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

TALKING DOG



A man tried to sell his neighbor a new dog.

"This is a talking dog," he said. "And you can have him for five dollars."

"Who do you think you're kidding with this talking dog stuff?" The neighbor replied, "There ain't no such animal."

Suddenly the dog looked up with tears in his eyes. "Please buy me, sir," he pleaded. "This man is cruel. He never buys me a meal, never bathes me,never takes me for a walk. And I used to be the richest trick dog in America. I performed before kings. I was in the army and was decorated ten times."

"Hey!" said the neighbor. "He can talk. Why do you want to sell him for just five dollars?"

"Because," said the seller, "I'm getting tired of all his lies."


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 8, 2009, 9:21 AM

Post #8 of 15 (2794 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

HUSBAND OR DOG



Q: What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?

A: After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 8, 2009, 9:22 AM

Post #9 of 15 (2793 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

DEAD DOG

Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog had recently died. "You know, he's probably up in heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."

Susie, still crying, said "What would God want with a dead dog?"


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 8, 2009, 5:52 PM

Post #10 of 15 (2767 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

Would you rather have a 300-pound dog chase you or a tiger?
I'd rather have him chase the tiger.

How many hairs are in a dog's tail?
None. They are all on the outside.

Why is a dog like a baseball player?
He runs for home when he sees the catcher coming.

What does a dog become after it is six years old?
Seven years old.

Which dog can tell time?
A watchdog.

What do you call a sheepdog's tail that can tell tall stories ?
A shaggy dogs tale !

Why did the dog have a gleam in his eye?
Someone bumped his elbow while he was brushing his teeth.

Why do dogs run in circles ?
Because its hard to run in squares !

What dog can jump higher than a tree?
Any dog can jump higher than a tree. Trees don't jump.

What place of business helps dogs who have lost their tails?
A retail store.

Why do dogs lie down?
They can't lie up!

Why did the dog say he was an actor?
His leg was in a cast.

What did the dog say to the candle?
Are you going out tonight?

Why are dogs such poor dancers?
They have two left feet.

What did the dog get when he multiplied 497 by 684?
The wrong answer.

What kind of modeling clay does a dog use?
Fi-Do!

Who gave the dog a black eye?
Nobody gave it to him. He had to fight for it.

What is a baseball dog?
One that chases fowls.

Which side of a dog has the most hair?
The outside, of course.

What is taller when it sits down than when it stands up?
A dog.

Eleven dogs shared one umbrella, yet none got wet. How did they manage?
It wasn't raining.

How can you tell a dog from a jar of peanut butter?
The dog doesn't stick to the roof of your mouth.

How can you tell a dog from a tomato?
The tomato is red.

How can you tell a dog from an elephant?
The elephant remembers.

How did the dog feel when he lost his flashlight?
Delighted.

What time is it when five dogs are chasing a cat down the street?
Five after one.

How did the dog make anti-freeze?
He stole her blanket.

How did the dog make gold soup?
He put in 24 carrots.

What should you do with a blue dog?
Cheer him up.

Which dog looks like a cat?
A police dog in disguise

Why did the dog sleep so poorly?
By mistake he plugged his electric blanket into the toaster and kept popping out of bed all night!

When does a dog go "moo" ?
When it is learning a new language !

What did the dog use to make his kite?
Flypaper.

Why did the dog sleep on the chandelier?
He was a light sleeper.

Why did the dog say meow?
He was learning a foreign language.

Why did the dog run in circles?
He was a watchdog and needed winding.

What word did the dog always pronounce incorrectly?
Incorrectly.

What do you call a dog in the middle of a muddy road ?
A mutt in a rut !

Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato fell on his head?
The tomato was in a can.

Why did the dog jump off the Empire State Building?
He wanted to make a hit on Broadway.

How is a cowardly dog like a leaky faucet?
They both run.

What do you call an alcoholic dog ?
A whino !

What is a dog's favourite sport ?
Formula 1 drooling !

Why doesn't a dog ever have a nose 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.

What has 2,000 eyes and 4,000 feet?
A thousand dogs.

What is a dogs favourite flower ?
Anything in your garden !

How can you tell a dogwood tree?
By its bark!

How many seasons are there in a dogs life ?
Just one, the moulting season !

What is worse than a dog howling at the moon?
Two dogs howling at the moon.

Why do dogs turn around three times before lying down?
One good turn deserves another.

When is a dog most impolite?
When he points.

What did the dog say to the pig?
You are just a bore.

Why wasn't the dog hurt when he fell off a 100-foot ladder?
He fell from the bottom rung.

What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear ?
A petticoat !

What kind of dog is very scary on Halloween?
A ghouldog!

What did the dog say when he chased his tail?
This is the end.

Why did the snowman call his dog Frost ?
Because frost bites !

Why did the poor dog chase his own tail ?
He was trying to make both ends meet !

When do dogs have 16 legs?
When there are four of them.

What is the difference between a barking dog and an umbrella?
The umbrella can be shut up.


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 8, 2009, 5:59 PM

Post #11 of 15 (2766 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

DOG DICTIONARY

LEASH:
A strap which attaches to your collar, enabling you to lead your person where you want him/her to go.

DOG BED:
Any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread in the guest room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room.

DROOL:
Is what you do when your persons have food and you don't. To do this properly you must sit as close as you can and look sad and let the drool fall to the floor, or better yet, on their laps.

SNIFF:
A social custom to use when you greet other dogs. Place your nose as close as you can to the other dog's rear end and inhale deeply, repeat several times, or until your person makes you stop.

GARBAGE CAN:
A container which your neighbors put out once a week to test your ingenuity. You must stand on your hind legs and try to push the lid off with your nose. If you do it right you are rewarded with margarine wrappers to shred, beef bones to consume and moldy crusts of bread.

BICYCLES:
Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to control body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bush and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside for a few yards; the person then swerves and falls into the bushes, and you prance away.

DEAFNESS:
This is a malady which affects dogs when their person want them in and they want to stay out. Symptoms include staring blankly at the person, then running in the opposite direction, or lying down.

THUNDER:
This is a signal that the world is coming to an end. Humans remain amazingly calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to warn them of the danger by trembling uncontrollably, panting, rolling your eyes wildly, and following at their heels.

WASTEBASKET:
This is a dog toy filled with paper, envelopes, and old candy wrapper. When you get bored, turn over the basket and strew the papers all over the house until your owner comes home.

SOFAS:
Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it is polite to run up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean.

BATH:
This is a process by which the humans drench the floor, walls and themselves. You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently.

LEAN:
Every good dogs response to the command "sit!", especially if your person is dressed for an evening out. Incredibly effective before black-tie events.

BUMP:
The best way to get your human's attention when they are drinking a fresh cup of coffee or tea.

GOOSE BUMP:
A maneuver to use as a last resort when the Regular Bump doesn't get the attention you require... especially effective when combined with The Sniff. See above.

LOVE:
Is a feeling of intense affection, given freely and without restriction. The best way you can show your love is to wag your tail.


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 8, 2009, 6:01 PM

Post #12 of 15 (2765 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

DOG RULES

NEWSPAPERS:
If you have to go to the bathroom while playing in the front yard, always use the newspaper that's placed in the driveway every morning for that purpose.

VISITORS:
Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its face and growl gently to show your concern.

BARKING:
Because you are a dog, you are expected to bark. So bark--- a lot. Your owners will be very happy to hear you protecting their house. Especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds. There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your protective bark, bark, bark ...

LICKING:
Always take a BIG drink from your water dish immediately before licking your human. Humans prefer clean tongues. Be ready to fetch your human a towel.

HOLES:
Rather than digging a BIG hole in the middle of the yard and upsetting your human, dig a lot of smaller holes all over the yard so they won't notice. If you arrange a little pile of dirt on one side of each hole, maybe they'll think it's gophers. There are never enough holes in the ground. Strive daily to do your part to help correct this problem.

DOORS:
The area directly in front of a door is always reserved for the family dog to sleep.

THE ART OF SNIFFING:
Humans like to be sniffed. Everywhere. It is your duty, as the family dog, to accommodate them.

DINING ETIQUETTE:
Always sit under the table at dinner, especially when there are guests, so you can clean up any food that falls on the floor. It's also a good time to practice your sniffing.

HOUSEBREAKING:
Housebreaking is very important to humans, so break as much of the house as possible.

GOING FOR WALKS:
Rules of the road: When out for a walk with your human, never go to the bathroom on your own lawn.

COUCHES:
It is perfectly permissible to lie on the new couch after all your humans have gone to bed.

PLAYING:
If you lose your footing while chasing a ball or stick, use the flower bed to absorb your fall so you don't injure yourself.

CHASING CATS:
When chasing cats, make sure you never --- quite --- catch them. It spoils all the fun.

CHEWING:
Make a contribution to the fashion industry. ...Eat a shoe


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 13, 2009, 9:22 PM

Post #13 of 15 (2670 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

When Good Dogs Go and Crossbreed

Pointer + Setter =
Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet

Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye Terrier =
Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries

Great Pyrenees + Dachshund =
Pyradachs, a puzzling breed

Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso =
Peekasso, an abstract dog

Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel =
Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle

Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever =
Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists

Newfoundland + Basset Hound =
Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors

Terrier + Bulldog =
Terribull, a dog prone to awful mistakes

Bloodhound + Labrador =
Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly

Malamute + Pointer =
Moot Point, owned by....oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway

Collie + Malamute =
Commute, a dog that travels to work

Deerhound + Terrier =
Derriere, a dog that's true to the end

Cocker Spaniel + Rottweiller =
Cockrot, the perfect puppy for that philandering ex-husband

Bull Terrier + Shitzu =
Bullshitz, a gregarious but unreliable breed


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 13, 2009, 9:25 PM

Post #14 of 15 (2669 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

50+ reasons for a girl to choose a dog... and not a man

A dog has long been a man's best friend. Few women have a problem with that. But when The Field - the magazine devoted to the hunting, shooting, fishing fraternity - suggested 50 reasons why dogs are better than women, it started the paw wars.

* Spots are an attractive feature on a dog.
* A dog is better protection from intruders.
* Dogs enjoy ball games. But they don't spend six hours on the phone trying o get tickets for France 98.
* Dogs greet each other by sniffing bottoms. Men are far less polite.
* Puppy love doesn't wear off so quickly with a dog.
* You can be prosecuted for neglecting a dog.
* Dogs can find their way back home - even after a really heavy night out.
* Dogs can be trained not to lie on the bed. Men always lie in bed.
* A dog can moult without becoming obsessed about premature baldness.
* Dogs can be taught the meaning of the word "NO!"
* A dog is far less irritation to have in the back seat of a car...
* ...and will be less likely to show its rear end to the people in the vehicle behind for a laugh.
* Elizabeth Hurley has a faithful dog whom she loves dearly.
* If a dog says sausages, that's clever. If a man says sausages, that's just greedy.
* Dogs will wait patiently outside clothes shops...
* ...and not criticize your purchases afterwards.
* A dog will fetch the morning paper for you.
* A dog will trot faithfully round at your heel.
* Dogs don't break wind in public and blame it on the man.
* In the canine world, boxers are quite intelligent.
* If a dog gets ill, it won't take eighteen Panadols in order to avoid having to go to the vet.
* You can also ask the vet to perform the snip, even if the dog objects.
* Small, ginger-haired dogs can be quite appealing. As for men? Two words. Robin Cook.
* You can find a nice dog by advertising on a card in a shop window, or in the classified section of the local paper.
* A woman can live with more than one dog, without rumours starting.
* When dogs beg, it's cute. When men beg it's pathetic.
* Dogs sometimes dig the garden.
* A dog can go out fox-hunting without being incredibly stuck up and pompous.
* Dogs don't necessarily prefer blondes.
* Dogs won't get embarrassed if you call them by a pet name when their friends are around.
* Dogs travel more cheaply on the bus.
* Dogs whine less.
* Some dogs can be quite talented at singing.
* Men lost the World Cup. A dog found it.
* Dogs are less reliant on tinned food...
* ...but after a few cans, a dog will still be able to stand up.
* And there are some things even a dog won't eat - like the remains of a three-day-old King Prawn vindaloo that they found on the floor behind the sofa.
* You can leave a dog alone in your house without worrying so much about what it'll break.
* A dog gets a new coat every winter.
* Dogs are not so careless about leaving puddles on the bathroom floor.
* A dog is less likely to leave a filthy, stinking mess for you to clear up.
* For a dog, a wet nose is a sign of GOOD health.
* Men are even less useful for testing cosmetics on.
* Dogs don't wolf-whistle.
* There are still thousands of totally undomesticated dogs in Australia; but far more undomesticated men.
* Your dog will never refer to you as 'a bitch'.
* In disaster films, the dog is always far more likely to have a miraculous escape.
* Dogs do not waste money betting on the dogs.
* You can stop dogs getting too randy by throwing a bucket or water over them.
* All the best clips on 'You've Been Framed' are the ones with dogs in.
* If a dog starts worrying sheep, that's just its natural predatory instinct.
* If a MAN starts worrying sheep, however...
* A 'King Charles' is much more likely to be a big, floppy-eared dog than a big floppy-eared man.
* You can also call a dog schitzu without offending it.
* "Working like a dog" is strenuous. Working like a man is, er - not.
* You can fondle your dog in the park without being arrested.
* A dog will encourage you to lose weight by taking more exercise. A man will just remark on how big your bum looks.
* Dogs do not attack other dogs for being a different colour.
* Having a dog around the place can actually ease stress.
* You'd feel guilty about turning a dog out on the street.
* A dog can take a barrel of brandy to a lost mountaineer without drinking ANY.
* There aren't so many good reasons to keep a dog muzzled in public.
* You can buy a dog's affection with a squeaky toy.
* A dog will be eager to walk, rather than getting a taxi.
* Most dogs are really good with children.
* Dogs have a highly-developed sense of smell. Men, on the other hand, can quite happily wear the same pair of pants for a fortnight.
* A dog is more useful for tracking down criminals.
* Who did YOU miss most from Blue Peter - John Noakes or Shep?
* A dog might actually take a bath of its own accord.
* There's more chance of your dog being able to operate the video recorder.
* You can buy a choke-chain for a dog.
* A 16-year-old dog is very mature.
* A dog is easier to keep well-groomed.
* Dogs have more chance of receiving an award for bravery.
* Dogs are easier to house-train.
* Dog do not scratch themselves so much in polite company.
* A dog can look as though it understands what you're saying.
* Dogs went into space first.
* A man will roll over and play dead only if you ask him to get up and make coffee.
* Dogs enjoy swimming, and not for the chance to ogle girls in bikinis.
* Being a dog's mistress is no reason to feel ashamed.
* You can keep your dog tied up if it starts misbehaving.
* Saggy skin and a hang-dog look aren't half as appealing on a man.
* You can train a dog in obedience.
* A dog in a studded collar isn't kinky.
* Few men would answer to 'Lassie'.
* A dog is a pack animal. A man is a six-pack animal.
* Dogs spend the day sniffing drugs only if they're with the police.
* Dogs aren't obsessed with 'doing it man-fashion'.
* A dog is a faithful companion.
* A dog is for life.


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein


vram46
Novice


Aug 13, 2009, 9:31 PM

Post #15 of 15 (2668 views)
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Re: [vram46] Dog Jokes [In reply to] Can't Post

Top ten reasons why a dog is better than a woman

10. A dog's parents will never visit you.

9. A dog loves you when you leave your clothes on the floor.

8. A dog limits its time in the bathroom to a quick drink.

7. A dog never expects you to telephone.

6. A dog will not get mad at you if you forget its birthday.

5. A dog does not care about the previous dogs in your life.

4. A dog does not get mad at you if you pet another dog.

3. A dog never expects flowers on Valentine's Day.

2. The later you are, the happier a dog is to see you.

1. A dog does not shop.


-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-
Cats and women will do as they please. Dogs and men need to relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein

 
 




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